Holiday Perspectives

Time management becomes a critical issue this time of year. With holiday shopping, school plays, decorating, family parties, Christmas caroling, baking, Christmas cards, delivering presents, special church services, and community projects, we run ourselves ragged! Factor in the increased need for cash this time of year and the stress level sharply increases!

For freelance writers, time management is a daily struggle. Your home is your office. You never completely escape from the sink full of dirty dishes, the laundry climbing the walls in the bathroom, or the cries of an unhappy toddler at your feet. Distractions constantly call you away from your work, and if you allow it, you can waste hours being unproductive.

In your quest for greater efficiency, remember to schedule time for your spouse and kids. Take time to play with trains under the dining room table, spend a few minutes watching a movie with your spouse (without your laptop perched in front of you), and call your grandmother just to say you love her. Life is about relationships. All the work will still be there waiting for you. The business world will not grind to a halt if you take a break.

In fact, take a few hours for you. Read a fiction novel, go for a walk, make a snowman in the front yard (even if you don't have kids!), take a long, hot bath, or go see a movie. Recharge your batteries and you will find returning to your work is easier.

Christmas is about the birth of an extraordinary baby. Don't turn it into a marathon of activities! Christmas is still Christmas without cookies, gifts, decorations, or parties. Keep things in perspective and use the holidays as an excuse to spend extra time with the people who are important to you.

Have a Merry Christmas and may your 2008 be filled with blessings, prosperity and love.

Twice Exceptional, Twice the Joy: Resources for Parents of Twice Exceptional Children

Imagine Teaching Robin Williams -- Twice-Exceptional Children in Your School
by Carolyn Cosmos

"We're learning more and more about children who don't fit the mold," says Mary Ruth Coleman of the Frank Porter Graham Child Development Institute at the University of North Carolina. However, even so, she observes, the education system is "not designed to address the needs of the child who is gifted and has disabilities." Coleman is a professor of special education at the university and serves on CEC's board of directors. "

"Imagine being Robin Williams' fourth grade teacher!" she exclaims.

Gifted children who are "difficult," who act out, the clowns and troublemakers, and the gifted with disabilities, Little notes, may have their problems diagnosed and may not be considered gifted at all. And students who have a wide spread of skills can have their high test scores canceled out by deficits.

Double Inequity, Redoubled Critique: Twice-Exceptional(Gifted + Learning Disabled)

These narratives invite us to look more closely at the way this dichotomous label "twice-exceptional" is constructed, authorized, and strategically employed, ultimately leading us to pay more careful attention to the significance of the difference, in the educational system, between the ideals of equality and equity.

Tips for Parents: Meeting the Needs of Twice-Exceptional Children by Meredith Warshaw

There are no easy answers for helping our twice-exceptional kids learn to tolerate difficulty, especially after they have been burned. It certainly helps if you can recognize when a task is hard for them and let them know that you understand. Starting easy and gradually easing them into more difficult work can help. Doing a task together (for example, co-writing a story with the adult acting as "scribe") can be a great way to start. One of the most important parts is being aware that there is a basis for the sometimes seemingly irrational over-reactions of twice-exceptional kids.

The Wechsler Intelligence Test (WISC III ) as an assessment tool

The article, Tests and Measurements for the Parent , Teacher, Advocate & Attorney is a useful starting point for understanding more about assessment.

Before starting to advocate for your child, I highly recommend a visit to the web page: Wrightslaw - Special Education. Read the article EMERGENCY! CRISIS! HELP! First Steps for the Parent Attorney or Advocate before doing anything else.

One problem people often run into when advocating for twice-exceptional children is that the children use their giftedness to compensate for their special needs so well that they perform at grade level.
Passing Grades, IQ Scores & Evaluations of Students with Learning Disabilities: Letter to Lillie/Felton.

The chapter on SMART IEPs from the Wrights' book "Wrightslaw: From Emotions to Advocacy - The Special Education Survival Guide (FETA)"

Your Child's IEP: Practical and Legal Guidance for Parents http://www.wrightslaw.com/advoc/articles/iep_guidance.html

Wrightslaw Game Plan: Writing Good IEP Goals and Objectives

Additional Resources
Websites
The website Uniquely Gifted is my collection of online resources relevant to twice-exceptional children. It includes sections on specific special needs, online support groups, advocacy, homeschooling, dealing with bullying, and resources for professionals.

LD Online is always a good starting point for learning more about specific special needs.

Wrightslaw has a wealth of information on advocacy and special needs law. If you do nothing else, follow their advice on keeping a paper trail and on how to write letters that will help rather than hurting your cause.

Email lists
Visit the website GT-World for access to an email list for families with gifted/special needs children.

GT-Spec-Home is an email list for families homeschooling gifted/special needs kids.

The Uniquely Gifted website has a section on online support groups that includes email lists focused on specific special needs.

Books for Kids
Some useful books for our special-needs children include:

Fighting Invisible Tigers : A Stress Management Guide for Teens by Earl Hipp. Free Spirit Publishing.

The School Survival Guide for Kids With LD by Rhoda Woods Cumming, Gary L. Fisher, Pamela Espeland. Free Spirit Press.

Perfectionism: What's Bad About Being Too Good? By Miriam Adderholdt-Elliot and Jan Goldberg. Free Spirit Press.

Putting on the Brakes : Young People's Guide to Understanding Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder by Patricia O. Quinn & Judith M. Stern. Magination.

When Nothing Matters Anymore : A Survival Guide for Depressed Teens by Beverly Cobain. Free Spirit Publishing.

Eli, the Boy Who Hated to Write: Understanding Dysgraphia by Regina Richards and Eli Richards. RET Center Press. This book, written by a mother and son, is aimed at elementary and middle school students and presents a student's experience of dysgraphia.

Views from Our Shoes : Growing Up With a Brother or Sister With Special Needs edited by Donald Meyer. Woodbine House. It can be difficult having a special needs sibling. This book can lesson the isolation, as well as helping parents understand what it's like for their children.

Resources for Gifted Children with Special NeedsCompiled by Meredith G. Warshaw, M.S.S., M.A.
Special Needs Educational Advisor
Contributing Editor, 2e: Twice-Exceptional Newsletter

Resource Room - The Resource Room is a website with tools for learning, especially for people who learn differently or who have "learning difficulties" or specific "learning disabilities."
http://www.resourceroom.net/index.asp

Fernette Eide, M.D. is a wonderful neurologist who specializes in gifted/special needs children. Her website has interesting articles with some great fMRI pictures!
http://www.neurolearning.com

Parenting Special Needs at About.com
http://specialchildren.about.com/parenting/specialchildren/

To do further research on your own, the National Library of Medicine has a free search engine for journal articles that you can use, called Pub Med. Searching Pub Med will get you citations and abstracts (if they are available for the article), and you can then order the full article if you wish.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/PubMed/

Tips for Raising a Twice Exceptional Child: How to Support Your Gifted ADHD Kid

Twice Exceptional is the new buzzword that applies to gifted children with learning disabilities. Our family knows this concept well. My oldest son is gifted and has ADHD. This twice-extraordinary child is quite a blessing and a handful!

He can escalate from calm to bouncing off the walls in a matter of seconds. He hears every sound in the room and feels the need to investigate each noise. He is emotionally and physically sensitive and cries easily. He takes everything to heart and is eager to please. The kid can memorize every line of the school Christmas play after hearing it a few times and creates beautiful drawings and artwork. He asks questions- many, many questions. He has a heart the size of Texas and has never met a stranger. These are all common traits of a twice-exceptional child.

Living with such an extraordinary child makes you appreciate life and love. It is also very exhausting. His little mind never shuts down. He rarely sleeps through the night and tells me of vivid, imaginative dreams nearly every day. His ceaseless questioning tries my patience some days and I long for silence more often than I care to admit.

We have struggled to find ways to raise this brilliant child to be a happy, productive part of society and a follower of Christ in deed and word. Here are some the tips we have found helpful.

• Just because your child performs well academically, does not mean he is doing well at school. Exceptional kids often struggle socially and rarely live up to their potential without help.
  
• Sometimes, even school-aged kids need a car ride to help them unwind. I often take my son along for short trips in hopes that he will unwind enough to fall asleep. Short naps work wonders on overly stressful days.
  
• Purchase many, many night-lights. If they are going to be up at night, you want them to be able to navigate without hurting themselves.
  
• Medications often have adverse affects. Even cough syrup can cause intense bouts of hyperactivity. Avoid all medicines except when absolutely necessary.
  
• Fresh fruits, vegetables, plain yogurt, and water should constitute 50% of his diet.
  
• Schedule, schedule, schedule! Schedules are the lifeline for these kids.
  
• Provide frequent hugs, cuddle times, and verbal praise- even if your TE child is a teen.
  
• Challenge their minds. Use adult language, ask their opinion on family issues, and involve them in philosophical discussions.
  
• Make friends with the local librarian, you will be seeing her often!
  
• Identify your child's weaknesses and help him strengthen these areas. ADHD children are often spatial learners and need help with tasks and concepts that may seem simple to other children.
  
• These kids are skilled at coping and adapting, but they often hide hurts, fears, and disappointments. It is not uncommon for them to have a slightly distorted view of things. They need a caring, honest sounding board.
  
• Teach your child that not every task must be done to perfection. Hang half-colored pictures on the fridge, go to the store in your play clothes, and eat the cake before it is frosted.
  
• Avoid the temptation to place your child in a higher grade. They can still learn extra material, but they need to socialize with peers of the same age. Social issues are difficult for the TE child.
  
• Break homework and large tasks up into smaller chunks and provide short sessions of free time or rest in-between work.
  
• These kids worry about natural disasters, violence, and death. The CNN newscast is not appropriate for TE kids. It only fuels these fears.
  
• Provide creative outlets. These kids need creative outlets just as they need air. Stifle the creativity and you crush their spirit. Go to art galleries, learn astronomy together, stock up on art supplies, and enroll them in music lessons- take advantage of this creativity as a bonding opportunity.
  
• Provide a unified parental front. Do not allow the child to play one parent against the other.
  
• Respond to every perceived hurt with love.
  
• Teach your child to think for himself. He wants to fit in and will cave to peer pressure easily.
  
• Tell him he is special and God has a purpose for him. He was given these talents and burdens for a specific reason and you would not change a thing about him.